Tabby Whitman
I’m doing this because of reasons and also because I don’t want to recalibrate the effing guns right now.
  • 01. Full name: Tabitha Jane Whitman
  • 02. Best friend: Hmmm… Nova. Or myself. I’m fricking hilarious.
  • 03. Sexuality: All of them.
  • 04. Favorite color: Neon colors.
  • 05. Relationship status: Single as fuck.
  • 06. Ideal mate: Someone who’s just as awesome as me but slightly more responsible.
  • 07. Turn-ons: Eyes, lips, brain, and general geekery.
  • 08. Favorite food: Cold chicken wings and Chinese food. Aww yiss.
  • 09. Crushes: Brett Bretterson from high school. I’m still waiting for him to FB friend me and then realize that the awkward game of “7 Minutes in Heaven” we played in junior was the best incident of his lip ring getting caught in my braces ever.
  • 10. Favorite music: Queen all the way, baby.
  • 11. Biggest fear: SPIDERS. They can go die in a fire, thanks.
  • 12. Biggest fantasy: UNICORNS EFFING EVERYWHERE.
  • 13. Bad habits: Biting my nails, cursing, sometimes slacking off when I should be helping save the world (like now, for instance).
  • 14. Biggest regret: Never taking ballet.
  • 15. Best kept secrets: I really want to be seen more than the goofy tech chick who’s sarcastic and nonsensical.
  • 16. Last thought: What?
  • 17. Worst romantic experience: My first fling in college decided we should get romanticafter he ate Buffalo Wild Wings with Blazing Sauce. I’ll let your mind wander as to what happened.
  • 18. Biggest insecurity: My feet. They’re weird-lookin’.
  • 19. Weapon of choice: Riot Shotgun, Fallout New Vegas style.
  • 20. Role Model: Catherine the Great

ask-theothernova:

I’m hiding in the Hawke’s old nest…

sonofabillionairegenius:

So quick to play the blame game. I have you know, I’ve been banned from any SHIELD property for like a year week, so it couldn’t possibly have been me or any of my small spy devices that wont trip SHIELD detection because I am that damn good. And I find the simplicity of such a juvenile trap beneath me. I would have done something much more elaborate and time consuming.

You’d be surprised at how many guns I’ve had shoved into my face since I was five years old. Seven. I am unmoved by threats and now I’m not going to share my new phone with you.

Miss Whitman’s correct, er, in a roundabout way, even though the use of weaponry is ill advised against a child. Tabitha, really? No one should be pointing any fingers until we have this matter settled. Dr. Banner is rightly upset and we are handling this as smoothly as possible without any further incident.

CASH STARTED IT.

sonofabillionairegenius:

tabby-whitman:

I’m sorry, who are you? I can’t hear you over the sound of… something clever.

I don’t know why I’m getting in a pissing contest with a fifteen year-old boy, but that’s beside the point. Hah, Stark. Hah.

I could say the same thing about you, Tabs, but then again, I’m me. I see everything. I saw that thing you did yesterday when you thought no one was looking. I was.

sonofabillionairegenius:

tabby-whitman:

Why you gotta blame a brother?

Because sometimes “a brother” does stuff that can get people killed. You are your father’s son, Stark. And while I have a major tech boner for anything from Stark Industries, I’m not afraid to throw down the gauntlet, young man.

So quick to play the blame game. I have you know, I’ve been banned from any SHIELD property for like a year week, so it couldn’t possibly have been me or any of my small spy devices that wont trip SHIELD detection because I am that damn good. And I find the simplicity of such a juvenile trap beneath me. I would have done something much more elaborate and time consuming.

You’d be surprised at how many guns I’ve had shoved into my face since I was five years old. Seven. I am unmoved by threats and now I’m not going to share my new phone with you.

Wait… Why are you banned from SHIELD property? WHAT DID I MISS WHILE I WAS hiding in the Hawke’s nest eating crackers and going “Caw-Caw, motherf***er” when people passed by was waiting for the all-clear?

And I’ll believe it when I see it, JJ. This is not encouragement (it might be). So if you do do anything, I am rescinding all responsibility.

You —

You’re a monster.

Introductions all around

sonofabillionairegenius:

You all know who the hell I am; I am pretty damn famous for just existing. How’s that for a life? You exist. Congratulations. Here’s fifteen years of the news media all up in your business. Joshua James Stark. Revel in it, ladies because you’re only going to see that name in print. It’s JJ, if you’re nasty. Son of a billionaire genius.  Don’t read too much into that, I get enough of that at home. But, I digress. You know me, I don’t know you, let’s fix this and get things rolling. I need something to keep me busy when I’m not at school, not with the Avengers, not holed up in my cave, not making Cash miserable every second of his waking life. You’re welcome, mate.

I’m sorry, who are you? I can’t hear you over the sound of… something clever.

I don’t know why I’m getting in a pissing contest with a fifteen year-old boy, but that’s beside the point. Hah, Stark. Hah.

Why you gotta blame a brother?

Because sometimes “a brother” does stuff that can get people killed. You are your father’s son, Stark. And while I have a major tech boner for anything from Stark Industries, I’m not afraid to throw down the gauntlet, young man.

I’m hiding in the Hawke’s old nest because SOMEONE thought it was a good idea to put a mouse trap in Dr. Banner’s favorite box of crackers.

That someone was definitely not me.

Probably.

So ask me questions until I hear the all-clear?

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE INANIMATE OBJECT?

Well, crap.

I was going to say my PS3, but I guuuuuuessss I’m going to have to go with my laptop. It can DO ALL THE THINGS!

Hello, blogosphere.

Apparently S.H.I.E.L.D. frowns upon chipping in your own two cents on conspiracy theorist websites when the information is classified. To try and keep me entertained, they’ve given me this.

Oh, the havoc I can wreak, THEY HAVE NO IDEA.

So hi. I’m Tabby. I’m 27, a Leo, raised as a farmgirl, matured as a technopath, and resident wrench-wielder at S.H.I.E.L.D. Ask me questions, make me your friend (or enemy) and let’s get this party started!